By Kyle “MT” Moats
13M Leaders of our Airmen and Airfield Weapon Systems -
This is a follow-up to my ‘Work-Life Balance’ comments made during the 20 Jan 2021 13M Virtual Mentorship Session led by Brig Gen Bruckbauer and Col Furleigh. The 13M Debrief Editors asked if I would be willing to expand my thoughts on a different perspective of what ‘Work-Life Balance’ means to me… and I said absolutely!
I view my work and life roles as more of a juggling performance rather than a balancing act. In this juggling analogy, my military service (work) is a rubber ball; resilient, sturdy, replaceable... while my family and health (life) are not rubber; instead, they are made of glass; delicate, unique, not easily replaced or repaired.
I first learned about the juggling analogy vs. work-life balance from a professor at Army CGSC last year. Since then, I have adopted it and discussed the concept and application during professional development sessions in my current unit at all leadership levels. We consider the challenge of work-life balance a continuous effort and have coined it “Constant Juggling Ops” (CJOs). Some days you feel like a professional juggler; others a novice. The goal is to keep practicing and acknowledge that it is ok to temporarily remove some variables from your act and take deliberate breaks to recharge and return even better.
I now think about the juggling analogy every time leaders or peers say, “you need to find work-life balance”… what does that mean? How do you define it? How do you know once you found it?
BLUF: If it is truly important to you, make it a priority, schedule it, do it, repeat as necessary.
As a young 13M CGO and new AOF/CC, I started collecting Tactics Techniques and Procedures (TTPs) to protect my free space on the calendar to balance my work and life. Some TTPs worked; most did not. It was only through trial and error that I discovered I was not really protecting white space. Instead, I was juggling work and life events and prioritizing commitments that were most important to me.
I have had the good fortune to work for and learn from some phenomenal leaders that make family time a priority and routinely schedule leave and time away from the mission. They led by example in their deliberate actions – they showcased that it is ok and encouraged to pause the work juggling ops to recharge and come back from leave ready for another round. I am aware that some may not have had similar leadership role models during their careers. This is even more reason I wanted to share my thoughts on this topic with the 13M Nation.
My juggling act consists of Family & Friends, Fitness, Personal Development, and Military Service (work). The following rules of engagement (ROEs) are a simple lineup of my current weekly battle rhythm. I only offer them as an example/technique. Rewind 15 years… I did not have work/life ROEs as a young officer and new 13M. I also acknowledge that these are not unique or profound, and just because they work for me does not mean they will work for you too.
I am definitely not implying that I have CJOs all figured out. Instead, I have been pleasantly surprised at how many of these TTPs/ROEs have remained the same through different phases of my 13M career. It is also important to mention that some of these will continue to and have evolved due to different roles, locations, COVID, deployments, surge ops, etc., you must remain flexible and own your CJOs.
Here’s my 13M Debrief and current CJO ROEs…
Family & Friends:
- Bedtime routine with my daughters is a sacred event. I make every effort to be home on most duty days for dinner, and at a minimum, home before their bedtime.
- The weekend is dedicated family time. I unplug from the mission machine, set the work ball aside, and recharge my batteries. I am always on call if the team needs me, but I do not ‘check in’ unless I need to.
- On my third AOF/CC tour, my family started visiting me on base to have lunch together. Wish I would have done this sooner. It is bonus quality time, a change of scenery, and I think it’s important for my Airmen and team to see and know my family and vice versa.
- Just like weekly huddles and drive-bys with your AOF team, I schedule weekly or routine FaceTime/Zoom calls with family and friends. I try to be deliberate and schedule them in advance. (I call my parents every other Thursday on the way home, we look forward to it, and they expect it)
Fitness:
- Sleep drives all emotions and functions. I schedule the opportunity to get at least 7 hours of sleep a night.
- I meal prep/pack my lunch and eat out or buy lunch as the exception, not the norm.
- My PT is scheduled for at least three times a week, not when I “feel” like it, but when I scheduled it. I try to also have a back-up plan when CJOs get out of control. Currently, I run 10 miles 3 times a week. As a young Captain, I ran 5 miles a day, 5 days a week back when I had “more time.” My weekly miles are a recurring goal, mental and physical health maintenance, and an endeavor of efficiency. Fun Fact: I was able to accomplish a personal record/running goal last year by scheduling and averaging only 3 hours of effort each week… 1,200 miles in 2020.
- I try my best to do something physical every day… whether it's pushups, pull-ups, sit-ups, etc. Our PFA is a condition of employment, and there are few excuses for any 13M to not meet the standard.
Personal Development:
- Daily meditation and prayer are foundational for me. I typically have a quick session in the morning and prayers at dinner and during my daughters’ bedtime.
- I am a big fan of audiobooks, podcasts, music, or documentaries while running.
- On the commute to base, I listen to podcasts, and on the way home, I make work/personal calls or listen to music to defrag.
- I try to constantly work on at least one book. Right now, the themes are parenting and leadership. There are MANY parallels in both of those topics but we can save that for a different debrief article.
Work (for me, the rubber ball ROEs are critically important to avoid mission creep and fixation):
- If you are reading this, you most likely do not have “free” moments during the duty day. I schedule admin time (again, I wish I did this during my first AOF tour) and can no longer just “plan” to do admin when there is a free moment.
- I use my calendar to block time for essential tasks and set reminders and follow-ups. I scheduled one hour to put this article together.
- In my current role, I try to not check email after 1800 or before 0600. Recommend you have a conversation with your leadership first before using this ROE. Expectation management for my team and unit is that we will text or call in real-time if it’s important and not rely on email notifications after hours.
- I also try not to send emails on the weekend or late at night. During my previous OSS/DO tour, my leadership sent emails every day of the week at all hours even though the airfield was not 24/7… it sent the wrong message (pun intended) to the receivers. If I send emails after duty hours, is that the norm or expectation for my Airmen too? Do I expect them to respond in real-time? Absolutely not! Everyone needs to unplug.
What do you do to control your CJOs while optimizing the 168 opportunities (hours) we are given each week?
Final Thought: This is not an all-inclusive list, just an example of how I am deliberately filling my days with purpose and scheduling times for what matters most during my juggling ops. This is also not a self-help article; rather a reminder that only YOU can and need to take control of your time. My TTPs and ROEs listed above are simple, achievable, yet flexible enough to bounce back from if I miss one or two of my daily ROEs. I am continuously developing my TTPs and ROEs for CJOs and welcome feedback or your TTPs for controlling the chaos of CJOs!
NOTE: Until last month, I did not know that rubber and glass balls were an established analogy for work/life. The article at the following link is a quick read/resource and an excellent summation of the concept above, presented to me last year. I am pleased to know this is not a new or unique concept, but it is definitely a different perspective worth sharing with our community and beyond.
About the Author: Kyle “MT” Moats is an active duty 13M currently stationed at Joint Base Andrews as the 89th OSS Director of Operations. MT commissioned through ROTC Det 645 from THE Ohio State University in 2005. Since then, he has deployed in support of Operations ENDURING FREEDOM, IRAQI FREEDOM, and NEW DAWN, served in 5 MAJCOMs, led multiple AOFs, was the 31st FW’s Director of Staff, and is currently on his second OSS/DO tour. MT is an avid runner and enjoys traveling and any outdoor activities with his family.
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